Grow old along with me! The best is yet to be….

This  quote by  Robert Browning in the Economic Times newspaper (India) this morning (March 5, 2011), caught my attention….the context  being that ET turned 50 and was inviting its readers to continue the shared relationship  with a quiet confidence of looking forward to a better future….

And this sparked off a thought…..  for all of us who have reached the milestone age of 50 or are hovering near about; whether the best is yet to be is luckily a mystery ;  but the more  important question is – to  how many of the populace in our lives can we honestly extend the invitation  of “grow old along with me!”

Many of the individuals that make up the fabric of our existence, simply ‘are’ a part of our journey so that the business of life is either dotted with hiccups or proceeds smoothly! But there is also room for that limited edition of angel  beings that transport us into a comfort zone where we are just happy to ‘be’ with that person. The trick part here is not to win the head count on the number of people we are supposedly ‘fortunate to be with’;  because all of us enjoy our association with most people some of the time; with some people some of the times, but only  a handful  bring out the best in us most of  the time…and the ‘kismet’ is in the number of interactions  that life affords us with these select few  who  make us feel that “there is no place else that I want to be…”

If  a special such person is a part of your daily life; consider yourself born under a lucky star! In the event that you are a little less favoured; revel in the connection, when it happens, and cherish the experience….it is these episodes that add the life in your years!

 

Predictably! Principle Prevailed over Prudence...

It was a balmy, beautiful Mumbai evening on Marine Drive with the sky and the sea bathed in the soft colours of dusk.... the queen’s necklace waiting to dazzle as soon as the lights came on and a sea of humanity to share the experience with...

The curving, winding  promenade (on Marine Drive) which hugs the sea ,  is a soul-soothing haven for all who flock there in the evenings...giggly, gangly college girls, serious walkers and joggers, the random strollers,  couples looking to share intimate moments in the perfect setting....trying to stay within  the decorum of Indian culture but occasionally submitting to the hormonal surge,  the ubiquitous lot who congregate to unwind  after a long day in a tough city and of course the  ‘janta’  who sit and watch the melee of people and activity and allow time to pass languorously  by...

And on that perfect evening, seated on the stone parapet were two young men, probably in their early twenties, who looked like they were enjoying their time out after a hard day's work. One of them was eating potato wafers out of the familiar yellow foil packet and once done, the empty packet was   casually tossed over his head to land on the tetra pods below. Though commonplace; the act rattled my sense of social and civic propriety and triggered an urgency to point out the error. But I hesitated at the thought that my point would not be well taken.  Predictably, principle prevailed over prudence and adopting my politest tone and speaking in ‘shudh’ Hindi; I first requested the fellow to not take offence at what I was about to say and then pointed out that he should have deposited the empty foil in the big litter bin right in front of him instead of sending it on a flight to no man’s land! Half expecting a rude and scathing comeback I was absolutely surprised when the young man apologised at once and admitted that he had erred. Before I could react, he grandly announced that he would undo the damage and jumped off the parapet and on to the tetra pods below. Fearing for his safety, and feeling guilty, I lamely tried to stop him. Ignoring my concern, he safely and successfully retrieved the object of attention and landed it squarely in the bin!

Enjoying the episode were the usual group of voyeuristic men (interestingly women are rarely a part of such groups) making the twosome squirm under their smirking gaze!  To counter that; in a deliberately loud voice I praised the youngsters for having done the right thing and added that they were really good and decent people...the awkward moment passed...

 But the encounter was not over... the errant one came up to me and said (in Hindi), “Madame you are very good and nice to have taken the trouble to point out to me that I did wrong. Not many would do that. Thank You!”  I felt validated and humbled and reciprocated my appreciation of their conduct....and soon we had a mutual admiration company going!

What could easily have unfolded as an ugly spectacle turned out to be a meaningful and lovely interaction with a real connect happening between strangers and both sides feeling elevated on the esteem scale! It bore out the truth in the maxim, “It is not what you say but how you say it that makes a difference’ and as a bonus brings about the desired outcome! (There are always exceptions).   That evening, at least one of us walked away; happier in the heart!

PS:  Wiser for the wear; the motley group of watchers quietly melted into the night!

 “I keep my ideals, because in spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart.”

- Anne Frank

'God made man because he loves stories' - Yiddish Proverb

Sudden Onslaught

 She heard the sound.  She looked up. Apprehension filled her face…Sweat broke out on her forehead…The last three steps to safety…..she broke into a run…..

What happens next?  I am sure, whether you are 6 or 60, you want to know... everyone loves a story! Precisely why; many a times, a non-fiction book can’t keep away the yawns (will come back to an exception) while fiction stimulates and is hard to put away till we are done with it. And if the story/book ends in a clear outcome; good, bad or sad (like in most classical literature); it settles something within us, allowing us to experience ‘closure’ and move on... an advantage that art (which imitates life)  has over life, which ironically is pretty miserly in affording us cathartic moments! On the other hand, an ‘open to interpretation’ ending piques the curiosity but leaves us with a vague sense of ennui...

There need be no consensus on what constitutes ‘enjoyable’ (each to their own), but essentially, good fiction is first and foremost a story well told. Language and craft are indispensable elements but often, the adjectives, metaphors and other attention seeking grammar nearly hijack the plot and overshadow the storyline! Paradoxically, simple writing (not to be confused with the banal) is often a tall order; with word smiths, at times, being naturally inclined to fanciful prose... 

Another core component is the basic integrity of the writer to the book; written, as a prize winning author recently confessed, because, “the book begged to be written” and not with an eye on the bestseller charts. When integrity, story and craft mesh seamlessly, it results in passages that flow and seem to be effortlessly written; establishing a ‘connect’ with the reader and making for a great reading experience...

Personally, I build a relationship with each book I read and in the process also build an impression of the author in my mind.  If perchance, an opportunity to interact with the author materialises, and he/she matches my perception; it raises the comfort level and enhances the pleasure in the piece of work. Unfortunately, the delight is marginally dimmed when the real person and the literary persona seem at odds...

I simply read...newspapers, magazines, books (fiction and non-fiction), blogs et al. But in fiction I am partial to Indian authors.  My all time favourite remains R. K. Narayan! The town of Malgudi and its inhabitants had me utterly engrossed and I always wished that there could have been many more stories about the fictional town and its very real characters... 

A few other names (not all in the top 10 circuit) that come easily to mind (in no particular order of preference and without offence to the ones left out in lieu of a challenged memory!) are: Khushwant Singh, Mrinal Pande, Jhumpa Lahiri, Bapsi Sidhwa (Pakistani author), Rama Mehta’s ‘Inside the Haveli’,  Satyajit Ray, Manju Kapur, R. K. Laxman, Anurag Mathur’s ‘The Inscrutable Americans’, Sudha Murty, Chitra Divakaruni Banerjee, Rohinton Mistry and in the newer lot, Chetan Bhagat and Namita Devidayal among others...

The exception to the rule; and the one book that I particularly loved reading and recommend to most people is, ‘India Unbound’ by Gurcharan Das. Although, a non-fiction book, it is first and foremost a story, 'well-told,' about India's economic history post Independence, with the watershed being the opening up of the economy in the 90s. Simply written and optimistic in its outlook; it comes together beautifully in a comprehensive assimilation of economics, history, social and political aspects interspersed with personal anecdotes...a must-read for those interested in understanding India’s economic background...

 And finally, ending the suspense of the incomplete opening story, here is the entire tale in only 50 words!  

  Sudden Onslaught

She heard the sound.  She looked up. Apprehension filled her face…Sweat broke out on her forehead…The last three steps to safety…..she broke into a run…..but she didn’t make it! ‘I must remember to carry an umbrella,’ she thought, surrendering to the onslaught of the rain!

Incidentally, being a book-lover and long- time reader; the above blog simply “had to be written!” The purpose being to highlight personal observations and not intended as a critique...

 Do write in and share your favourite stories, books and authors and view points...

'Oxygen' - unadulterated !

       

”…the barrage of macabre, depressing, vapid information that generally stares back at me at the start of the day…”  (Quote from a newspaper column) is a sentiment silently echoed by the majority.  From terrorism, politics, climate change, sports, thefts, rapes, kidnappings to dysfunctional social patterns, indecent and undignified behavior from people in all walks of life to disturbed relationships; news, views and information make most people cringingly reach out for  multiple doses of caffeine to encounter the day. Additionally, some grimness sets into the face and lingers in the rear labyrinths of our consciousness for the remainder of the day.  

Seemingly frothy stuff also does not escape unscathed. Along with the lovely snapshots of exotic locales you have a worried checklist of dos and don’ts. In itself, this list of dos and don’ts is a helpful tool but the smart, modern mind gets stuck with compliance and fun and adventure take a back seat!  

 In love?  Wait!  Did you check whether the X, Y, Z person you are interested in matches the criteria listed in the magazines? Do you even know if he/she is your type? If not, take a quick quiz and be better informed. Still feel a strong attraction? It is only a simple chemical reaction in your body. Not convinced? Do a reality check by answering a brief questionnaire that will decode the feeling and demystify romance.  In the final analysis; falling in love? Whatever were you thinking of!

 The world of Finance and Commerce is to a certain degree immune from the spectre of overriding realism. This is partly due to the fact that the Economic tableau looks bright and the potential is promising. But it is equally true that ‘numbers’ are magical – they can be juggled, manipulated, interpreted in your own fashion and creatively  dressed up to enchant;  until the bubble bursts (as we have witnessed).    

Advertorials and advertisements seem to be the only category inhabiting a perfect world, wherein everything from liposuction to buying your dream home is as easy as snapping your fingers and life is always gung ho!

 Amidst all this, what is the role played by the recipient?  Typically, the build up of negative angst is a great ‘coffee’ conversation topic and after satisfactorily lambasting the break-down of all that is good and right, there is little else the average person can do or does.    Robert J. Oppenheimer says, “the optimist thinks that this is the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears it is true!’     So what is the way out in this ever imperfect world, overrun by physical and mental pollution that is making us gasp?  

 A shot of unadulterated oxygen that will punctuate the despairing mind-set and infuse a sense of mental well being (albeit briefly). The oxygen can take the avatar of your choice….   A sincere prayer, a walk, talk, jog, muscle-crunching, music, a musing, a memory, a remembered scent or touch of that someone special, a  shared smile,  people being nice, a day that seems made just for you,  good news, a day-dream ….anything that brings a smile on your face and a spring in your step!  The tedium of life will always weigh us down. We need to jump up and grasp those ethereal moments. And then, for those few sublime seconds there is perfect harmony and synergy of the yin and yang energies …making us aware that God’s smile is upon us and all is well! Pass on the good vibes before life interrupts and takes over again…